A Slow Boil

Things are warming up out there. The energy I was counting on to produce torque on pedals and issue decreess of authoritative power to slavish strong legs got used up producing sweat, and converting water to make more sweat, and performing all the unheralded tasks in a system to prevent organ failure and blackout.

The heat makes me slow. Please reference the BRC hall of records if you need verification of this: official excuse #119/ RE: Heat Makes Slow.

It isn’t even real summer yet. There is time to adjust.

The Hummingbird diet- a steady trickle charge of sugar water and 4 avocados per day might save me. Starting the ride before 1:00 P:M might help.

Who am I kidding? Nothing can help. The magma will slowly (I want so badly to say inexorably, but that word was retired in 1996!)ooze across our land until it singes the will of the strong and the weak alike.

Tomorrow, or maybe today, I flee north for the week- as if there is any escape.


9 Responses to A Slow Boil

  1. It’s May; do we really have to start discussing the unyielding, relentless heat?

    I’m rolling like mr. thong does around tally, beatin’ the heat has never felt so dirty!

  2. Mr thong? Does Superman with his cape still run around on Monroe there?

    If I remember right, this time of year there meant yellow pollen everywhere. And air as thick and oppressive as wading through butter. And fog. I think it’s OK to complain about it now.

  3. Mr. Thong is amazing. As in- I am amazed he gets away with that.
    Nicol- I believe the Superman runner died recently. Cancer? Am I right here? I’m sure someone knows.
    Juancho- Yeah. It’s getting hot. The Moons are turning on their AC at night which means it is officially hot.

  4. King Love … Superman … now Mr. Thong. New evidence for the decline of Western civilization.

    If inexorable is retired, Roget’s also offers mercilessly and remorselessly. Are those too anthropomorphic for lava?

  5. exactly hitops. too anthropomorphic. Nobody feels a connection to “inexorable” and yet is everywhere. I think we need a word that evokes the notion of bad policy moving throughout a bureacracy. You know it sucks, but it is impossible to stop it.

  6. inescapable. Thank god you showed up OB! We will talk about Mr. Thong another time. when you are sitting down.