Don’t Bonk on Candy Mountain

It is not enough to pile on the miles day after day after day never taking a day off the bike no matter that your legs feel pressed in the vice and the blood runs through them like pancake batter the point is to not run out of candy candy candy.

It was only Sasquatch and a lap of Munson not a problem even after 30+ crushing miles being pulled around by the nose or worse by that damned CL Smooth up in the real hills north of town where the true cyclists ride. A handful of raisins and a diet Root beer fortified with nutrional Sucralose got me 9/10’s of the way around Munson and then the tank hit bottom and on mile 5.9 of the 6 mile ride Sasquatch made his big move. I never should have waited up for him after the trees.

Great move Sasquatch next time I will bring more candy candy candy.



4 Responses to Don’t Bonk on Candy Mountain

  1. Neh, candy corn is my one true god. This picture is intended to signify the Platonic perfect “form” of all candy unrealized in the abstract. Candy Corn is the pure manifestation in the subjective world.

  2. I keep telling you these guys you ride with are too smart. It sounds like Squatch employed the “I’m so blown attack”. It works nearly everytime. From now on make sure to keep the folicle farm in front of you.
    Be strong Juancho and carry a snickers!