Chuck murks around the grocery store exclaiming the price of every item that goes in the cart:

Assorted Chicken parts- $4.99 per lb.

“FOUR NINETY-NINE A POUND!”

Twizzlers- $.85

“EIGHTY-FIVE CENTS!”

8’O’Clock Bean Coffee- $5.19 per lb.

“FIVE NINETEEN A POUND!”

You might think he is 85 years old and recently crawled up from a bunker where he awaited the consequences of the assasination of Archduke Ferdinand. You may also think he is new to this country, recently disembarking from the remote archipelago of Chuckistan where price standardization is de rigeur, almost as common as their use of the phrase de rigeur. You would not be correct.

Chuck is just