Despite my big talk, the marquee event on this vacation is sleep. Hours and hours of endless dreaming. This vacation is sponsored by Goodie P:M sleepytime headache powders. I assume I am saving up on sleep in preparation for the sleepless hell I am about to encounter grunting lost in the mountains, cursing the day I ever took that job living in the kitchen in Moose, WY working for Soup, Mystery, Cupcake, Hardman, or the most damning name of all-Steve Newman!
Meanwhile, after kicking and clawing his way out of the swine flu Sasquatch has discovered a new lease on life through the www.livestrong.com total life management system. This website offends me and everything for which I stand. Lance’s lifestyle army wants to know everything you eat, everything you do, and it offers preloaded non-custom critique of those choices. Had a bagel? Should have had spelt bread! Ran a mile? Should have run two! I hereby dub that site the “should” factory. He thinks it is free, but I feel strongly there is a price to be paid along the way. It is likely more dangerous than Facebook.
Then again, maybe it is an excellent tool, made available from a place of altruism deep inside Lance Armstrong’s cold reptilian heart.